I would have quit

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed That I would see the goodness of the LORD In the land of the living. Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the LORD! - Psalm 27v13-14

Sometimes when doing devotional thoughts you go along and get little blessings and thoughts that just kind of encourage you along the way. Other times you get something that is just like it is written for your personally and delivered on just the right day.

I have been battling some discouragement of late. I love the ministry God has given us. The few people that God allows us to work with our the greatest in the world. But despite all the talk about 'spiritual growth' and things like that I can be tempted to 'lose heart' as the psalmist puts it when I see just how few we are. It seems like the world is falling apart and that wickedness is getting worse and worse. It seems like no one in the world has time or interest in anything to do with God. It seems like we need great numbers, and yet the number of believers in our little church struggles to even stay level. Jobs are sparse and folks are forced to think of emigration or returning to homelands to find work.

This is the reality of some very dark days in a very dark country.

I can identify with, 'I would have lost heart, or fainted, or given up, or quit...'

The problem is when we get focused there. That is where I find myself sometimes.

But the psalmist goes on with that wonderful word 'unless.'

'I would have given up, but I remembered.' The psalmist chose to remember that God would show His goodness 'in the land of the living.'

I can't help but be drawn to another verse that has been a bog part of my life. 'Be not weary in well-doing, for in due season you will reap if you do not faint.'

'Wait on the Lord,' the psalmist writes, 'Be of good courage, He will strengthen your heart, wait, I say, on the Lord.'

Though I don't necessarily 'like' this response to what I perceive as my emotional needs, I am grateful to know that God is not unaware, that He is working, and He cares enough to teach me.

Thanks, Lord, for remembering me. Help me to remember you.